When I was a teenager and my mother threw that particular phrase at me, I swore up and down I would never, ever use it on my own children. And sure enough, when they were very young and angelic, hubby and I never spoke those words and I actually - and oh so foolishly! - thought we'd never need to. Then they became teenagers, making our lives a living hell, and we used the phrase every chance we got just to make them mad. I totally sympathized with my mother, which didn’t happen very often. Trust me.
Picture me saying this with an insane giggle; our oldest daughter is getting payback, and the grandchildren are only in the first grade. Heheheheheh.
The time was Thanksgiving evening, long after the turkey had been demolished. My daughter and my son-in-law were entertaining and sent the little girls to their room to play. These are the granddaughters who had been at Nana's and PawPaw's earlier and impressed me with their wonderful behavior. (PawPaw was sequestered in the bedroom with the 50 inch flatscreen TV, a turkey leg, and the football game.)
A little while later, my daughter noticed that things had gotten awfully quiet in the girls’ bedroom. When you have children who are five and six, quiet equates trouble. About the time she noticed the ominous silence, my younger granddaughter came running out yelling these unforgettable words: “Mommy! Mommy! Katie’s trying to make me drink her pee!” Sure enough, when my daughter went to investigate, somehow my older granddaughter had managed to, well, squat over a Beauty and the Beast teacup and offer it to Cammie as refreshment…maybe her own twist on an after-Thanksgiving-dinner aperitif.
I received a hysterical phone call from my daughter. “Momma, what is wrong with these kids?” she wailed. After I asked her what happened and got the whole story, I laughed so hard I almost gave myself a hernia.
Her father was thrilled. “Lemme talk to her,” he said. “I told you your behavior would come back to haunt you one day,” he crowed upon taking the receiver. When he hung up, we high-fived each other and laughed like witches over a cauldron.
Her father was thrilled. “Lemme talk to her,” he said. “I told you your behavior would come back to haunt you one day,” he crowed upon taking the receiver. When he hung up, we high-fived each other and laughed like witches over a cauldron.
My granddaughters are still young. Wait until they’re teenagers. We are literally rubbing our hands together in gleeful anticipation.
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